Loner: 12 things you can do alone to get yourself feeling all Christmassy and warm inside

Oh my giddy ants, my last post was 2000 words! I am so sorry, that is basically a normal sized essay. To even things out this time I have decided to just make a little list.

It is coming to the end of the Advent's Advent (more commonly known as November, but I call it the Advent's Advent as it is the advent of the advent - get it - and I actually made up an excellent Christmas song about it, which I am tempted to put on youtube and link to below, but I am not ready to be a viral sensation yet, which you know, I totes would be once "It's the Advent's Advent" hits the masses...anyhoo back to my point) so it is basically CHRISTMAAAAAAS!

I've made a little list of loner things you can do to get into the Christmas spirit. I realise Christmas is not really a time to be alone, but to be with family and friends - Elvis Presley even made a song about how crap it is to be lonely at Christmas (with no one to hold). Nonetheless if you are anything like me, sometimes there are days when your friends and family just can't keep up with your Christmas spirit, so for when your boyfriend wants to stay in bed rather than go on a Christmas pub crawl, or your mum insists mulling wine is just a way of ruining a good bottle of red, here are some ideas of things you can do to get into the Christmas mood.

Some of them are blatantly obvious, a lot of them just involve doing what you would normally but adding a mug of mulled wine and Michael Buble's Christmas album as a soundtrack, but they are all guaranteed to make you feel a bit more Christmassy. Yay!

1. Make your own bauble and drink some bubbles, at Homemade's "Bauble and Bubbles" with dates throughout November and December - When I went to Homemade London with a friend, there were other people by themselves, and I don't think it would be cringey at all to turn up alone - I think I will in the future. Plus there is nothing more luxurious in the world than drinking prosecco by yourself.

2. Watch a Christmas movie - Ok such an obvious one, but definitely will make you feel Christmassy. I watched my first Christmas movie of the year - Love Actually - yesterday. Personally, I have 9 films I watch every year, always in order of Christmassyness to get me into the Christmas spirit. So I start with Love Actually (as it is set 5 weeks before Christmas) and Meet me in St. Louis (as only some of it is Christmassy) and end with It's a Wonderful Life on Christmas Eve and White Christmas on Christmas Day. Works a charm. Also, add some Christmassy snacks to the experience and it goes up a notch: quality streets, mince pies, yule log. Yesterday I sat down with the Christmas cheese of choice, blue stilton, and a mug of mulled wine. Christmas o' clock.

3. Go to a Carol Service -  I quite like going to things like the proms by myself as I think it makes me appreciate how beautiful classical music actually is, and it all sounds more poignant more epic. If I go to church, I also quite like going alone for the same reasons. It just feels more spiritual that way for me. Though I will be going to a carol service with my family and friends this year, I'll also be heading to the NSPCC's London Carol by Candlelight service alone. A fantastic choir singing carols, some celebrity readers, lots of lovely candles in one of the most gorgeous churches (Christ Church Spitalfields) about and wait for it... prosecco and a cupcake included. And the proceeds from the ticket goes to charity. It don't get more Christmassy than that. Book here.

4. Make an advent calendar. Pro bloggers Elsie and Emma from the USA, always have absolutely amazing craft tutorials in their blog, A Beautiful Mess, which look very professional but are not actually too tricky. I really love this one to make a string Advent Calendar, which is almost enough to make me give up a chocolate one this year. Almost. (Also, if you want a good excuse not to eat chocolate every day check out these beauty ones on beauty and lifestyle Blogger Pink Confetti's site).

The advent calendar you can make if you check out abeautifulmess.com (copyright Elsie Larson)

5. The Christmas mile at Kew Gardens. So turns out Kew Gardens isn't just a summer place, but a winter one too! This Christmas a mile of Kew Gardens lined with fir trees will be decorated with glasshouses, illuminated fountains and enough fairy lights to look like fireworks frozen in time. Lovely to stroll down with a lover or a friend, but if they don't fancy it, nice to spend a little "me time" in too.

6. Wrap presents. So bang smack in the face obvious again, I know, but I am not doing all my Christmas wrapping in a hurried mess on Christmas eve, this year I pouring a huge mug of hot mulled wine and putting Michael Buble's Christmas on and actually enjoying it. I also want to wrap them as nicely as my limited skills will allow. I am thinking this year, instead of buying lots of paper in Paperchase, which although beautiful gets glitter everywhere, I am going to buy just some cheap brown paper and then get a cute little stamp and ink to make my own Christmas wrapping paper. notonthehightstreet.com has lots of fabulous designs. I personally love this stag stamp and this little gingerbread man one.

7. And on a similar note... write cards. I reckon I am at the age now, where I should start sending them, rather than just giving people gifts with their name on in marker pen.

8. Have a Christmas Bath: Is that a thing? If not it definitely should be. Is there anything more wintery and snuggly than lighting a few winter spice candles, chucking in your Lush Christmas pudding bath bomb and relaxing with...you guessed it a mug of mulled wine and Michael Buble's Christmas album on. If you're a bit fed up of all the mulled wine you've had so far, I am also really loving a hot Cawston Press Apple and Rhubarb (just in a mug and heated up in the microwave for a minute or so) with a dash of Fire Eater Cinnamon Whiskey thrown in.

Holly Golightly, £4.75 and The Christmas Penguin, £3.25 from Lush

9. Go Christmas shopping...another obvious one, but I definitely think the hustle and bustle is probably least stressful braved alone. And there is so much different types of Christmas shopping to be done in London. Gawk but don't necessarily buy, at the amazing window displays and decorations in Harrods, Liberty, Fortnum & Mason. Join the crowds on Oxford Street, or go searching for Christmas food at Borough Market, sipping on hot cider and testing some Christmas cheeses.

10. Christmas past exhibition at the Geffrye Museum - wander around the rooms of the muesum in Hoxton, looking at how the average room was set for Christmas all the way from the 15th century to the 1970s to the present day.

11. Go and get a red cup - or for that matter a snowman/gingerbread/santa claus cup (from Starbucks and Costa). Nothing like walking home in crisp cold weather with a limited edition peppermint hot chocolate or a praline cappuccino to warm your mits.

12. Volunteer - It is the cheesiest thing in the world, but I genuinely believe that what makes Christmas a million times better than any birthday, is that there really is joy to the world, and goodwill to all mankind. That is what makes it so magical. What better way to spread some of that goodwill at Christmas than to volunteer? A couple of years ago I volunteered for Crisis at Christmas. Crisis is a homeless charity, that every Christmas hosts a shelter with all the trimmings. And I mean all the trimmings. As well as serving homeless people across London a Christmas dinner, and giving them a bed for a few nights, Crisis at Christmas provides everything from legal advice to live Christmas entertainment to haircuts, and all of it is given by volunteers. If you want to sign up to be a volunteer from Crisis at Christmas (if you are not a songstress or a hairdresser, you can be a general volunteer like me, which basically means you spend your days chatting and playing chess with Crisis' customers) then you can do here. You can volunteer in Newcastle and Edinburgh too. I really love a Christmas at home with my family, so the 2 days Crisis asks you to give up I don't fancy every year, so if you want to volunteer more flexibly or you don't want to volunteer with homeless people, but would prefer something else, I found this terrific network the other day, Hands on London, which means you can volunteer doing lots of different things with no minimum commitment. Check it out here.

And that's it! Maybe not as succinct as I initially promised...sorry!

Happy Advent's Advent!

Do you like a random list? If yes, check out my post, Lover: the pros and cons of moving in with your boyfriend, as told by Beyonce's visual album

Friend: Go on a walking tour right where you live

When my friends and I moved into our first flat in London, my friend’s parents were a little concerned on 2 counts.

Firstly, that I was living, in what I lovingly call “the den”. Ie, a double bed and a half sized cubby hole behind the bannisters on the landing, enclosed with walls only ¾ of the way round and no door.

And secondly the area. If you don’t know Bethnal Green or indeed East London, it is an odd place. A kind person might describe it as gritty, a more honest one might acknowledge it is impoverished in parts, but yet it is trendy, where 2 bedroom apartments regularly are sold for around a million pounds. My friend Steve describes it as “50% upper middle class white families, 50% ruthless gangsters” which gives you an idea, but actually Bethnal Green is much more of a fruit salad of cultures and bank balances than that. Even though our flat was super swish and modern, with big floor to ceiling windows, oak floors and all white and spotlights, search the postcode and marked on the map is "Kray twins lived here" (the 50s and 60s notorious east London gangsters) and "red light district" both about 100 yards from where we lived.  Whilst looking out the kitchen window you are treated to a view of the London skyline – the gherkin, Heron tower, later the Shard - look out the living room window and you can see into what is literally a crack den, with a burnt out roof. Walk 200 yards to the pub down the road to pay for your £5 “craft beer” pint, and you’ll pass a couple of prostitutes sipping on Sainsbury's basic lager on the way. 

But my Dad - or Popster, as I like to call him, to give him props for the Tu Pac listening to, anorak wearing, mathematician gangster that he is – truly is one in a million, and loved my new set up.

Firstly, he was very encouraging about the den, and agreed with me that paying £430 including bills a month for it was a bargain I couldn’t turn down. (And err FYI it totally was, look at all this fabulous sound and eye proofing - a screen, blackout curtains and a sari - which made it like a marvellous little cave bedroom: )

Of course, when Will wanted to stand up in the den we had to open the sky light, but for 5 foot 3 of me, it was fine!

But my Dad also bloomin loved the area. “I love this area” he announced once he had finished heaving my suitcase full to the brim of books up the four flights of stairs. “This is the real London, I would love to go on a walking tour around here”. So I thought: Ok Dad, walking tour ey, say hello to your Christmas and Birthday presents for the next 10 years. 

Now if you’ve read some of my posts before, you might remember I do quite enjoy an “experience” gift. I am a fan of when I give someone a present, manoeuvring the situation, so that I too get to stuff my face with cream cakes/ go to a spa/ go see a show etc too. Part of it is probably quite selfish, I basically can’t get someone else a present without buying myself one.  Part of it is maybe tinged with narcissism, in like a “ and for Christmas I am giving you the best gift of all, quality time with me!” sort of way. But actually, I do try and get experience gifts to be nice, and to share a really memorable extraordinary time with someone else, doing something they might not have even thought existed or would never bought tickets to themselves, but really love. And with my parents I think experience gifts are an especially a good idea: so many of the best, most interesting, most unique and most fun experiences in my life they have paid for me to have, and thought of and been with me for. So now that I live in London, and am constantly doing things they wouldn’t know to book, it is time for me to repay the favour.

I actually went on both of the walking tours I review here 2 years ago, and 7 months ago respectively, but as Christmas is coming up, I thought I’d dip back into my old photos and route around in the dustiest corners of my memory as I think, if you haven’t thought of something to get your one in a million Dad, or Mum, or brother, sister, boyfriend, Grandpa, then a walking tour is quite a neat little gift. 

The first walking tour has changed slightly, but I've found the same guide on a new website - East London Walking Tours, and the tour provider  London Walks has one that looks pretty similar.

Dad's Christmas present 2011 - Not another Jack the Ripper tour: an East London walking tour - taken October 2012

As someone who comes from a village that was a field 50 years ago, one of my favourite things about London is how when you walk down her streets, you can imagine the hundreds and thousands of people who have walked down those same streets – maybe without the same concrete slabbing and double yellow lines – but same streets just the same - literally hundreds of years ago. It makes you feel gloriously little and yet significant at the same time, like looking at the sea and stars. For me, I get this much more in the fairytale world of Chelsea and Mayfair than in east London where I live, in Kensington I can almost envisage bumping into J. M Barrie around the next corner. 

I wanted to get that same feeling right where I live, as, after all, the east end has some pretty wonderful history and some pretty incredible people who have lived there too, and walked those streets in the past. 

Hit horribly by the Blitz in World War 2, you might not be so steeped in old architecture in the east end as much as the west end, but people very much lived here. The infamous Jack the Ripper in the Victorian times and the infamous Krays after the war, are just the tip of the iceberg, the east end has always been teaming with life and a history worth knowing.

My Great Uncle Bernard, one of the funniest men I've ever met and who used to drive to from Brighton to Bethnal Green every day to work, has some great stories about the east end, including his own story about how the pub his office was above rigged a up a pipe so he could enjoy beer fresh from the pump at his desk. That is what being in East London was all about. 

For "not another Jack the Ripper" walking tour we met outside Whitechapel station, on a crisp and sunny October Sunday morning. Our tour guide David's grandmother was one of the Jewish immigrants from the Tsarist Russian empire who came to the east end at the beginning of the twentieth century, so he really knew, loved and in lived in the area. He didn’t just want to talk about Jack the Ripper, or the Krays, but every edge and every curve (yes I’ve quoted John Legend on purpose) the east end had to offer. 

I don’t want to give you a run down of everything in the walking tour, as you should just bloomin go on it, plus I don’t want to get sued or told off for giving away David's secrets. Plus, from a little routing around on the internet, it looks like the exact tour I went on, which was from London Walks has disappeared, but David's got his own company doing a range of east London walks the aptly named  "east London walks" so I am confident you can find one very similar, if not exactly the same. But here are some pictures, and some of the special stops David talks more about on the tour. (This is probably about 10% of the sites that are covered, I wouldn’t say these are the highlights by no means, but they are probably the best pictures!)

Marx wrote some of the Communist manifesto in the library above Aldgate East Station. This isn't the only spot of communism and revolution you come across on the tour.

The Blind Beggar where Ronnie Kray shot and killed George Cornell in 1966. David remarked it had changed quite a bit since then, except for the toilets, which maybe hadn't been cleaned since.

The place of St Mary's - "the White chapel" for which the area was named. The chapel was destroyed in the blitz, but a few remains still clonk around Altab Ali park, named after the Bangladeshi clothing worker, murdered on his way home from work in 1978.

The East London Mosque is one of the biggest in all of Europe - 35,000 people attend to worship here every week.

I thought this walking tour was great, and amazing value for money, and I wholeheartedly recommend both this tour if you live or are ever in the east end of London, but also more generally I recommend doing a walking tour of where you live. Part of the reason I probably remember this tour so well, is because I am reminded every time I pass these sites of how special they are and how lucky I am to live in such a wonderful place that has housed so many amazing people before me, and will house many more when I am gone.

You can book a tour with David on East London Walks here.

Or you can book a walking tour of the east end and other spots in London on London Walks here.

Dad's Christmas Present 2013 - Eat Your Way Around Brixton by Fox and Squirrel - enjoyed in March 2014

I love Brixton. It is where I first ate deep friend macaroni and cheese, a food which would definitely be part of my last meal, if I ever committed a serious crime in a country where they weirdly think it is ok to punish someone by killing them. (They serve it at Chicken Liquor (formerly Wishbone), alongside fantastic fried chicken). It is also where I received my first (and last) blackberry messenger, from a boy called Lavon, who I met in McDonalds and used the chat up line, “do princesses eat Big Macs?” (Yes Lavon, they do.) It is also where Hootananny’s is, where you can spend an evening eating burritos, shotting tequila slammers and dancing to live reggae, so that says it all really. And I figured, if my Dad like the east end for it’s “real Londoness” he would love Brixton. Enter last Christmas’ Christmas present.

Fox and Squirrel’s food walking tour really takes you to all the corners of Brixton. I’ve always associated it with Jamaican cuisine, as I know Brixton is damn good at that, and although Fox and Squirrel do take you for your share of ackee saltfish and goat roti (at Fish, Wings and Tings – one of the best) they also take you to all the places you didn’t realise even were in Brixton, and it makes you realise how much of a fabulous multicultural neck of the woods it really is. 

On my tour with Fox and Squirrel we enjoyed everything from Ethiopian in what appeared to be a kebab shop, to Lechona (a whole pig which is stuffed with rice, herbs and lots of delicious pork) at the back of a Columbian food market to self brewing Brixton beer.

The tour begins at an Ethiopian coffee ceremony in a covered market stall

Brixton's breweries beers are named after the area such as Effra Ale (named after the river which used to flow through Brixton) and Electric IPA (after Electric Avenue)

I am about to be a massive, unpleasable fuss monger, for which, Fox and Squirrel, I am sorry. The great thing about Fox and Squirrel is that they took you into places you would never normally go because you didn’t want that thing where everyone in the restaurants goes silent and looks at you to happen, and because some of the restaurants (tables at the back of supermarkets etc) didn’t look that good – there were plastic tables, plastic forks, in the Ethiopian shop for example there was a man passed out on the table next to us. (And not from eating too much). You get it, I am a bit of a snob and they weren’t places you would take someone on a first date, unless you wanted to come across super quirky. But my snobbery isn’t exactly the problem, as I really didn’t care that they weren’t that nice, as for all of my home counties up bringing I've spent enough time in a dirty student house and backpacking around Asia to be ok with that sort of thing.

The problem was for the cost of the ticket, the food and the places we were eating, to me personally, didn’t seem that great a value. My feeling is it is totally ok to take someone to a Columbian supermarket to try something weird, but don’t charge everyone £70 for it. Obviously a lot of the expense is Fox and Squirrel’s expertise, but I think I have been spoilt by a food tour in Rome for where the cost of 40 euros, and I was given more food to eat than I normally would in a week. And a fair bit of wine. And it was all delicious.

(If you are ever in Rome by the way, you should go on "eat like the Romans do".  I had coffee, canolo, caprese salad, melon and parma ham, 5 different cheeses, 3 slices of pizza, mozzarella parmagiana, 3 bowls of different pasta in a sit down restaurant that was nice, gelato and approx. a bottle of wine. Bargain).

So I guess my complaint, as someone who can be a tight arse about everything but glittery nail varnish, for me personally, Fox and Squirrel wasn’t the best value of money. But if you are visiting London, or new to the area, and you want to see a side of London you would normally never see then it will be a great food walking tour to go on. You can book here.

If you like old London buildings and things, then you should go for dinner up the St. Pancras clock tower. Read all about it in my post "How you can have the most magical and wonderful time up a clock tower, for £85 all in, which is actually a bargain honest"

Lover: How you can have the most magical and wonderful night up a clock for £85 all in, which is actually a bargain honest

Are anniversaries a thing apart from when you are married? I'm not quite sure. I mean, I have definitely been guilty of doing this, but having 6 month anniversaries of dating probably isn't a thing. But annual ones? I reckon so. As people stay together for yonks before they get married nowadays, or even don't get married at all, it seems right that there is something to mark time passed in happy monogamous relationships, because ring or no ring, finding someone who will both put you first and indeed put up with you (and someone you put first and can put up with) for significant uninterrupted lengths of time is pretty tricky. Plus it is always good in my book to have a time to be showered in gifts (or at least a gift) and to have an excuse to go on an amazingly frivolous, indulgent and special night. To that effect, on Friday night Will and I celebrated 3 years since the time I - full to the brim with cherryade and vodka - kissed him outside a pub in Putney and gave him my number. It was a debate as to whether we should relive that night by going down to Citizen Smith shotting jagerbombs and then snogging outside on the street or whether we should do something nice. In the end we chose the latter and went to the pop-up supperclub Una - which is currently taking residence in the clock tower of St. Pancras. And it was amazing.

So my phone has started doing this thing where Google makes my photos "auto amazing", so it took my relatively rubbish photo of the table set for Una and made it much better.

My expectations for Una were unbeatably high: I sort of had daydreams about me and Will taking an instagram selfie where we were hanging off one of the St Pancras clock hands like something out of Peter Pan with fireworks going off in the distance, and although that didn't happen (obviously) it was just as good.

The St. Pancras Renaissance building is probably my favourite building in London. It reminds me of Disneyland - it both looks like a building which wouldn't be out of place in Disneyland and it is also from there the train which takes you to Disneyland departs. I've always sort of thought if I won the lottery, I'd buy a place in the building, even though that seems a bit ludicrous, as Kings Cross is definitely not the nicest part of London, and for £1million+ (the last apartment in the chambers sold for £1.7M according to Right Move) you don't even get any outdoor space. The St. Pancras Renaissance was built in 1873 as a grand hotel, and indeed the 5 star Renaissance Hotel still takes up a good chunk of the building today. Most of the rooms in the hotel are new ones, at the back, but there are some suites which are still in the original building. The 1873 hotel quickly became out of date, and despite the grandeur of the building, residents couldn't use any of the facilities that were becoming a norm in rich households by the beginning of the twentieth century - if they wanted a bath there was no running water, someone would have to bring warm water to them and fill up their tin ones. The hotel shut before re-opening again, and some of the building became the "chambers" - private apartments throughout the building, and the best one, in the clock tower itself, is where the Una supper club takes place. PS. totes learnt all of that clever shiz from the owner of the clock tower himself, who swung by to say hi, and was actually very normal, for someone who owned one of the best known places in all of London.

The views from the clock tower are pretty good, but not breathtaking. The gothic architecture windows don't let you see as much as the floor to ceiling ones which are in all the new "observation restaurants", and it is only actually on the 5th floor - bearing in mind if you want to go to Aqua at the Shard or the Duck and Waffle you are on the 31st and 40th floor respectively. But what you lose in views, I think you more than make up for in atmosphere, sitting in the part of the tower which is big enough for a bell but never has had one (the clock never chimes as it strikes).

Una is Spanish for one, and the supper club is just 12 people round just one table. I've been to these sort of dos before, and assumed it would be lots of people basically having dinner in their already established groups, but just happening to sit next to some strangers. But actually, because the meal lasted for 4 hours, you actually became pretty good pals with the people next to you. I think I got lucky, sitting next to Lavonne and "Ron" (I've just made up the name Ron, as Ron, I'm really sorry but I've forgotten your name) who were an eastern medicine practioner (Lavonne - a Northern Irish reflexologist and aromatherapist) and western medicine practioner ("Ron" a Zimbabwean anaesthetist). It was lovely chatting to them about where acupuncture's place is in the NHS (for the record Lavonne acknowledges that holistic healing can't cure but relaxes the mind, and the mind can accomplish great things, whilst "Ron" claimed he had witnessed someone have their thyroid taken out - ie their throat cut open - with purely acupuncture to control the pain. Both had a great acceptance for each other's professions, which I always think of as at odds). Also, meeting people who had come to this quirky little night up a clock, meant that there were loads of like minded people with lots of fabulous recommendations for some great little things to do in London (all which will own their very own blogpost).

Anyhoo, I have waffled on for too long, so now I am going to tell you about the 7 course menu - in pictures. (It is going to change a little in January, but it will still be delicious gourmet South American influenced food by the Argentinian chef, Martin Milesi)

As I don't like mushrooms, and I couldn't really tell what this was this wasn't my favourite course, but it is one of Martin's more "conceptual" pieces - a cheesy piece of bread with a plant growing out of it - a fake potato - in soil made of olives, truffle oil and mushrooms.

This is probs not one for vegetarians, but I really liked that both pork belly and steak were on the menu, when normally I have to choose between those two. I realise the picture of the dessert (bottom right) just looks like a blob on my phone camera, but believe me that blob of chocolate is probably the best thing you will ever taste. The top left is a four corn soup. A slippery one to photograph.

CEVICHE. My new favourite thing

A meal that may have converted me to black pudding

After my (I guess) 8th glass of wine, I got brave (and stupid) and started climbing to the clock, before I realised it was impossibly high, so gave up here.

Oh also, I forget to mention the best bit - matched wines (which the waiters come round and fill when you've finished your glass) and a welcome cocktail are included in the price. And if you still want an extra tipple (which we did) then the drop dead gorgeous Gilbert Scott is just outside.

I can't remember what I drank here because I was already sloshed on the gzillion glasses of wine in Una, but it was beautiful and delicious

So I err, made a GIF of my outfit which my boyfriend says is quite vain, but I was very proud of it, and went to great lengths to get it. (I legged it across to St. Paul's to from Shoreditch when I left work at 5:30 to pick it up from Topshop, and back to Bethnal Green to get ready in a flash before meeting Will at St. Pancras at 6:45. I had to put on liquid eyeliner standing up on the tube. But it was worth it). It is also a GIF because you can't see the tummy bulge that happens when I wear tight cream dresses and eat 7 courses of food, I am moving too fast. (The fur lined dress is Topshop - it has 3/4 length sleeves; the pale blue coat is ASOS, the belt vintage and the leopard print shoes Hobbs)

Book it now, here! Now excuse me whilst I go and buy this for everyone I know and love for a Christmas present.

Like exposed brickwork and candlelight? Then you should go to Mishkin's - check out my post "Lover: Mishkin's Covent Garden, they have 3 types of macaroni cheese there"

Loner: Craftiness - look at all the cheeriness and fun you can get out of this £5 bunch of flowers! (Flower Pressing and arranging. In a young hip way)

For my friend Katy's recent birthday we went to Wilton's Music Hall. That is definitely worth a post in itself (it is the oldest surviving music hall in London, originally built in 1743) but I was on too much of a prosecco and "it's my friends b'day and I am out on a Thursday night" high to take photos of anything but the fairy lights. Although frankly a whole post committed to these babies would be no bad thing:

I first met Katy when she was dressed as jellyfish and I a crab at "the BOP" where all the cool Manchester uni kids hung out on a Friday night, but it was only years later we realised she was the girl I complimented on her tentacles and I was the crab in the toilets who she spoke to. Our first meaningful meeting was when she was dressed as a flamingo and me a snake, and since then we have had some wonderful times dressing as cows, donkey kongs, hooter girls and hedgehogs to name just a few*.

Here we are as cows, donkey kongs and members of the rock band Kiss. Some context for the donkey kong picture: we have just woken up after a raucous night out hence why my make up is so smudged and we are without our inflatable donkey kong bats...heaven knows how Katy's face looks perfect down to her coppery metallic eyeshadow. I have just slapped katy around the face with a piece of ham, which is why she looks both pained and bemused. I cropped that out cos I didn't want to come across weird.

Nowadays we spend much more time hanging out together in normal outfits, which don't co-ordinate with each other and would not prevent us from holding down any type of full time employment.




Katy is mega lols and super nice as all of my friends are, but on top of this some things I particularly admire about Katy are:

1. her ability to eat considerable amounts of cheese
2. that she can rap the whole of Nelly's Hot in Herre
3. that she is a worthy dance off opponent when we get down to Chris Brown's Forever (he is a troubled man, but Forever is probably the best song in the world which isn't by Beyonce, Dolly Parton or Frank Sinatra. Or Michael Jackson. Or Joni Mitchell)
4. the size of her wardrobe (she's a talented fashion buyer for a living, and, judging by the envious collection of clothes she has, also in her spare time)
and
5. her fabulous card making skills. Behold:

This card is not just fabulous on the outside, but on the inside too; it reads:

You are an Independent Woman who pays her Bills, Bills, Bills not letting the Bug a Boos (who are Crazy in Love) Put a Ring on it. You are a Survivor and If I were a Boy I would be Jumpin' Jumpin' all over you.

As I love Beyonce, you can imagine how sweet these words were to me. For the good of everyone, I have linked each of these songs to the youtube video, in case you want a little Bey in your day.

Side note: I realise Beyonce is becoming a recurring theme in this blog to the point it is starting to evolve from a London lifestyle blog, to a slightly creepy Beyonce fan site...To correct this, I will try and not mention Beyonce for the next 3 posts. Try.

Anyhoo, you get the context. For Katy's birthday, I had to go all out on the card front, rather than just writing a message on a post it note, or using a marker pen on the wrapping paper, as is my standard.

The flat I share with Will is only about a 4 minute walk from Columbia Flower Market, another little slice of east end history, where it seems like thousands of people flock to every Sunday to snap up some bargain bouquets. Ever since we've moved in I've been wandering down the road and buying as many bunches as my fiver can get me.

I spent £5 exactly and out of this lovely lot I managed to fill 2 big vases and 5 little jars, and made 2 cards. So I rewarded this thriftyness by spending £24 on 3 different faux flower garlands on ebay afterwards, even though it is now November and not really flowers in the hair season. Hey ho.

Here is how I did it:

Flower pressed cards

As well as flowers you'll also need pritt stick, card and some sort of nice pens to decorate them with. I splurged on some "uni posca pens" from  Cowling and Wilcox as I envisaged I might use them on weekends to draw pictures of Broadway market and the canals and stuff. Haven't used them since of course, but they were jolly good for this, as they are like a pen with a paintbrush lid. A bit like a really good and really thick nail art pen. (But don't put them on your nails, it doesn't work out).

1. Choose your flowers wisely, as there is less room for error on little ones if you are an amateur like me. I went with some pink gypsophila (gyp) and some lovely lilac delphiniums.

2. Snip away at your flowers. You'll only need a couple of strands of each for each card, and they'll only need to be the length of the card, so you don't need to use the biggest stems. Use the parts of the flower which would be too short for the vase anyhoo

3. Pop the flower cuttings in a folded piece of white paper, and shut this in a big heavy book. Then pile all your other heavy books on top. Don't overstuff the white paper, you ideally want to make sure each of the flowers has a little bit of space around them too, for when they flatten and widen when pressed.

If your dad doesn't buy you massive hardback books every Christmas, then you can use the yellow pages or even a massive pile of magazines to press the flowers instead.

And 1 week later....

Once you're flowers have pressed for the week, you can make them into cards or indeed anything else using any materials you like, but this is how I turned mine into greetings cards with no artistic talent whatsoever:

4. Get your piece of card, and fold it in half, to make a card.

5. Draw a rectangle border around the outside of the card, and then another one inside of this. Don't worry if the line isn't straight, unless you are more of a perfectionist than me. I think it all adds to the homemadeness of it.

6. Fill in the borders with a little shape. In Katy's card, I alternated little stars and hearts. In Lauren's card (I made Lauren a card too, my friend who had just got married) I drew mini horseshoes and hearts.

7. Position up the flowers. Gingerly cover them in prittstick, and lather some on the card for good measure, then press them on to the card. As long as the paint or pen from the border has dried, you can then place a plain piece of paper over the flower card, and then a heavy book on top of this to gently make sure your flowers really are stuck to your card.

8. Probs need some advice from you guys for this step. This is the point where you can write your message (I wouldn't do it first as then it might be a bit stressful trying to fit your flowers around it) but I think I messed up a bit here. If I was doing it again, I think I would try a pen not quite as thick and bold as my paint pens, but you know, obvs a bit classier than a biro.

And you're done:

Yep you're right, that isn't Katy's birthday card, but my friend Lauren's "Congratulations on your wedding" card I also made. Showed a slightly different finished product to be slightly unpredictable and charming (/might have forgotten to take a finished picture of Katy's before I gave it to her and yes, I also didn't take a full picture of this one either, hence why the Congratulations bit at the top is cut off...)

With all your loads of leftover flowers, you've got enough to fill plenty of vases.

I did a long tall display, using mainly the delphinium and just adding a few sprigs of gyp, and only cutting a tiny amount off the bottom.

I then did a cut them short (often doubling up the gyp by cutting it in the middle and putting both ends of the strand in a vase) and adding the delphinium I had left.

I then used the few stray bits of gyp to put in the little glass bottles and jars I had nicked from the table display at my cousin's wedding. (My auntie said I could! She got them from charity and second hand shops).

Fancy getting crafty with some cards and flowers? It will cost you:

Do you like making stuff, but aren't that good at it? Even if you are, check out my first craft post: Loner - craftiness: make a little twist on Victoria butterfly collections you can hang in your home

* by the way, in case people were unsure we weren't in some sort of weird fancy dress group, dressing up is just basically my euphemism for getting outrageously pissed.